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The last several months have brought so many life changes, and I've been so unsure of where I stand, or what I'm becoming or who I want to be or who I should be. I'm a homeowner now, but I never realized how difficult it is to actually maintain a home. I work for a new company, and there are so many new responsibilities that I have to learn, while maintaining my previous commitments, and I think I'm one of many in the company who is a little confused of where they stand and where their future lies. There are other aspects in my life where I question where my loyalties lie, what really matters, what kind of person I have become and what kind of people I surround myself with. My world has been a little crazy, a little off, a little out of control.
I heard this song the other day, and it made me think. I've been so into working out who I want to be, what I think people want me to be, that I've lost sight of who I am. I've transformed my life into something complicated and confusing. I had forgotten that I was perfectly happy with the old me - just because my environments change doesn't mean I have to change myself. A lot of stress has come from trying to be something that I'm not.
So yeah, I'm trying to find myself, go back to the basics and try to not take things as seriously anymore. Just because I may be surrounded by things and people that change, doesn't mean that I have to make myself change. I can't let the lies, goss
So welcome back, me, I've missed you.
I don't need to be anything other
Than a prison guard's son
I don't need to be anything other
Than a specialist's son
I don't have to be anything other
Than the birth of two souls in one
Part of where I'm going, is knowing where I'm coming from
I don't want to be
Anything other than what I've been trying to be lately
All I have to do
Is think of me and I have peace of mind
I'm tired of looking 'round rooms
Wondering what I've got to do
Or who I'm supposed to be
I don't want to be anything other than me
I'm surrounded by liars everywhere I turn
I'm surrounded by imposters everywhere I turn
I'm surrounded by identity crisis everywhere I turn
Am I the only one who noticed?
I can't be the only one who's learned
I don't want to be
Anything other than what I've been trying to be lately
All I have to do
Is think of me and I have peace of mind
I'm tired of looking 'round rooms
Wondering what I've got to do
Or who I'm supposed to be
I don't want to be anything other than me
Can I have everyone's attention please?
If you're not like this and that, you're gonna have to leave
I came from the mountain
The crust of creation
My whole situtaion-made from clay to stone
And now I'm telling everybody
I don't want to be
Anything other that what I've been trying to be lately
All I have to do
Is think of me and I have peace of mind
I'm tired of looking 'round rooms
Wondering what I've got to do
Or who I'm supposed to be
I don't want to be anything other than me
I don't want to be
Yano dear don't worry, this is the sort of activity that is usual for the stage you are in Life. Just remember that you can't please other people and you will be happiest if you're being yourself. Do you like the person in the mirror? Many others do too! As for those that don't, well too bad for them!
Posted by: SusanG on November 5, 2004 07:40 PM*hug*
Just know that you're not the only one struggling with this. I like to think of it as a phase, but just know that you'll find your way. It might take a little bit of time, but you'll get there.
I so agree with Susan G, ya can't please everyone...but as long as you're happy with you, then it's all good.
Keep yo' head up girl! =)
Posted by: LeeN on November 5, 2004 09:21 PM
