Hmm...this is going to be a long one....I mean, I'm going to be going over the enitre YEAR here. You may want to print this out and take it on the train home so you have something to catch your drool as you fall asleep...

So anyway, with the coming of the new year, I've been really thinking about this past year, and how much of an impact it's made on me. So much has happened in the last 12 months, good and bad.

Truthfully, this can be listed as the worst year I've ever had, from stresses at work to little dramas in my life to my mom's sickness and death. It's been hard.

But on the flip side, this has definitely been the best year of my life, from planning the wedding to moving to California, to meeting all the amazing people in my travels to getting married. It's been a blast.

So it's been one hell of a rollercoaster year emotionally from the highest high (getting married) to the lowest low (my mother's passing). I don't think I could have gotten through it if not for the help of friends and family, and in a little way, this blog. It's helped me vent out my frustrations, share my joy, and give me something to do when I feel like I'm going crazy.

So looking back, trying to sum up the past year, weighing the good and the bad, there is one word that I think sums it all up, that I found myself using often in the last few weeks. Blessed. I have been blessed this year.

...Blessed to have met and married someone like Dave. Someone I love, respect, adore, admire and who tolerates my crazy antics. I have seen a part of him that he doesn't show to the world, a silliness and a goofiness that he shares only with me. He is definitely the love of my life, and I'm so lucky to be with him, and he's lucky to have a chica like me! Oh. And he's got a hot bod, too.

...Blessed to have been brought up with the love of my mother and father. Although I lost my mother this year, I know I was lucky to have had her in my life. Not everyone grows up with both parents, and I know I was fortunate to have them both take such an active part in my life.

...Blessed to know that my mother passed knowing that I loved her. In the movies, people always have regrets because they never get that last moment to say goodbye and I love you. But my mother passed knowing that I loved her, knowing that many people loved her. And I realized before it was too late what a remarkable, strong woman she was.

...Blessed to have two sisters that I adore. I may not get along with them all the time and maybe once in a while have urges to push them out of my car as I'm driving, but I love them. I'm not as good of a big sister as I'd like to be, but they're both wonderful sisters....most of the time.

...Blessed to have a huge family that I can rely on. Ever since birth I have been enveloped in the love and support of my extended family, and although I'm not related to most of them, they are closer than blood to me. They have been there for me through everything, always there to be by my side, to make me laugh, to cry with me, to just sit around with me and do nothing.

...Blessed to have friends that are just kick ass awesome. My wedding was the best day of my life, not just for the fact that Dave is now my slave husband, but also for the fact that I got to spend the day with my best friends. We had so much fun and the day was that much more memorable because they were a part of it. I'm so lucky to have friends that are so understanding of my inability to keep in touch, reply to emails or return phone calls. Because I suck as a friend. But the friends I have are the best, because even though I suck, they still stand by me.

...Blessed to have made such wonderful new friends this year. Whether it be by people coming by this blog, or through my short track escapades or through comic books, I've met a lot of new people this year. And I would have to admit that some of these people I have grown to consider to be my closest friends. It's amazing how many incredible people I've met, and how these friendships have grown throughout the year. Too bad these suckers don't know what a sucky friend I am yet. That is the final test of my friendship!

...Blessed to have had the crazy experiences I've had this year. Aside from getting married, I had some really incredible things happen to me this year. Doing interviews in Salt Lake City with Olympians, working at the Aspen booth at the Chicago Comic convention, meeting Jim Lee, driving cross country to live in Long Beach, actually having friends to visit when I travel to different cities, going on my very first cruise, blogged for 24 hours and made lots of money, was upgraded from fan to webmistress, my first live Christmas tree, and so much more! If I stop to think about it all, I think my head would explode!

...Blessed to be employed. As much as I bitch and moan about how sucky my job is, I know there are people out there who don't have jobs. So I know that I should appreciate mine. Even though I'm grossly underpaid. And overworked. And underappreciated. And feel there is no place for advancement. And I feel my company might fold over. But hey, it's a job.

...Blessed to be loved. One of the things that I had said during my mother's eulogy was that if you give love, you'll get love in return. And as much as I could this year, I have tried to show people love, to share love, to inspire people to enjoy life and love it. And I have felt it in return. Sure, there were times that I wasn't too loving, but that's something I need to improve on. And although sometimes the love that I gave to people wasn't returned, there was never a point where I didn't feel loved. And I didn't spread love to get it back, I shared it because I love to see people happy. Making people happy gives me a little high.

So yeah, that's my review on the year. It's actually shorter than I anticipated, but then again, it's about time for me to go home from work, so you lucked out this time!!! (until I get home and post more)

2003, thank you for all the experiences. Each one has molded me to become the person I am today, good and bad.

2004, I can't wait to see you. I've got a lot of big plans for you!

Posted by Yano at December 30, 2003 04:30 PM

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